Throughout all of this chaos, we remained strong and powerfully in love together. He shut down once after his longest, 3 week stay in the hospital and was depressed for about a month. it has been 6 days now since he spoke to me and he avoids me completely. and avoid shutting down.. Every year, we reach over 6.5 million people around the world with our intersectional feminist articles and webinars. Then go back to the topic once the shutting down is addressed. If your partner tells you to "shut … I feel like we’re a million miles apart.’ ‘I don’t know if I love him anymore.’ “What we’re talking about here is emotional abandonment. ‘I feel distant from my spouse.’ ‘I try to get my husband to open up, but instead he just shuts down.’ ‘My wife just doesn’t seem interested in me anymore. RELATED: 3 … "Shut up" is one of the worst things we can hear from anyone we're trying to have a conversation with, let alone a partner. we don’t see each other at all even though live in the same house. the latest episode is the longest and most severe. He literally shuts down. I mean, my SO tends to leave for a bit if we are arguing (not every time we have a disagreement but an intense argument) and he gets upset. Once this happens then together you can face the fear and eventually not shut down any longer. Dear Beloved Reader, we're going to be real with you.. We're asking you to join our membership program so we can become fully financially sustainable (and you'll get cool perks too!) At that time he did not have a job so I didn’t push him to come out of it. i’ve spoken to him about it after conflict many times. Stonewalling — when a person completely shuts down or disengages in the middle of an argument without warning — makes your partner feel as though you’ve pulled the rug out from under them. Stop the topic you were attempting to have and discus the shutting down. The idea is to discover together why the shutting down is happening. Ask your partner to give you a few minutes, but be clear that you want to keep talking about this. Facing each obstacle as a team. Calm down and then return to the conversation. The world around us saw how happy and strong we were. my husband often gives me the silent treatment. For example, if your partner appears distant and seems to "shut down" during arguments, it could be a sign that the relationship is on the rocks. We all have fears and insecurities. I know he does this, he knows he does this, and I accept it as his coping mechanism, but leaving for days is not acceptable. 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